The Vagenda

15 Bad Choices You Can Make This Week


The world is full of tough decisions – and hey, I’m a choice feminist, so I’m not gonna make them for you. But, y’know, I have no qualms in telling you what not to do. So, in case you needed a little guidance this week, I’ve summarised 15 bad choices you could make that you probably want to avoid:

1. Buying one of these T-shirts
2. Raising your daughter using a pamphlet written and provided by the Conservative government
3. Watching this music video on repeat until you cry
4. Starring in your own porno loosely based upon Girls. Lena Dunham won’t like it
5. Choosing your university based upon Student Beans’ University Sex League
6. Booking a holiday to Kavos, Malia or Magaluf (Shagaluf)
7. Paying someone to blog your wedding, especially if you’re going to complain about “20 photos of the flowers, but only one of my nan”
8. Taking Fox News’ advice on feminism
9. Reading magazines that feature articles entitled ‘Why Ironing Can Make You Happy’
10. Realising that the Bank of England is getting rid of the only female face on banknotes, and taking it lying down
11. Missing the deadline to apply for a position as the new Doctor Who. Fly the flag for the female doctor, ladybros.
12. Bidding in the new auction to sell off Banksy’s Slave Labour mural, possibly the most ironic thing to ever happen to an artistic critique on capitalism
13. Backing Marine Le Pen, who just compared Islamic prayers to Nazi occupations
14. Setting up your own cupcake business
15. Getting into The Lad Bible for a bit of light reading
You have been warned.

16 thoughts on “15 Bad Choices You Can Make This Week

  1. obviously all these are really fuckin’ irritating but the video for ”Blurred Lines” is the cue for major feminist rage, o wow. a role-reversal video would be such a good idea

  2. The “explicit” (better titled : fucking so outrageous that its embarrassing) video for blurred line is quite appropriate for the title of the song.
    Pharrel quite clearly finds it hard to see the line between pornography and artistic license (Not like he much of an artist).
    I would be more than happy donate my university maintenance loans to aid the production of the role universal video.